Reply: Uneducated Literates

Rarely you get a comment that is a mix of suggestion, criticism, answer and question. Here is one and I really liked it. Reply to this comment would be so explanatory and justified (may be controversial) that I could brainstorm in discussion for hours. Here is the comment posed on my previous post Uneducated Literates and follows my reply.

You went for nightouts for your projects, you studied and toiled with all reverence and you landed up doing a job where mere diploma-holders could suffice. Who asked you to do a job like this? Who stopped you from doing R&D? Who asked you to join the herd of sheep or that of penguins for that matter? The answer is simple dude, its "you"!! You could have sought a challenging career even as a photographer, you could have excelled as school teacher with all your knowledge. But no, you from the very beginning were after something else. And let me give you a simple suggestion my friend, very few places give you both of what you seek. So, stop cribbing about what companies are doing, because you yourself are in that very mess(i suppose). Go and join CERN if you want to do some high-level research and drill down your brain to the brink. You are talking about India as a country, look at yourself dude, "you" are India and so are all of us. Cribbing is the favorite sport for Indians. So let Mr.S be happy with what he is doing, rather stop your whole body from burning and do some good.

-Anonymous Comment


I am not sure what you mean by 'cribbing', I use cribbing for copying. But from the context that you are talking about, I feel you mean 'frustration outburst' when you use cribbing. So, lets take one-by-one bottom up questons of yours.

First thing, I am not writting something that is a consequence of some 10 minute frustration and I shed it down on blog. Yes, I was frustrated at the very moment when Mr. S described, but afterthought made me realize that the dream he was running behind could have been achieved some three years back, plus he would have been a specialized in the work he was planning to do.


If he could have joined a NIIT J2EE Expert course, he could have been learning technology specifications for 2 years, a certification from Sun and we would have had a strong Java developer. He could have add-on more expertise during his career.


The problem here is career guidelines are hazy. We follow mob psychology, so if Mr. S's cousine did his B.E. in Civil Engineering then he joined Infosys, and now, after 3 years in Infosys, he is on on-site assignment in USA. We follow that path blindly without looking at inefficiencies in that. And, actually, that's justified for it is verified. But... had there been a open minded thinking over the process, you see a guy learnt Civil Engineering for 4 years, does some hefty swift course for a quater of a year that enables (and perhaps specially made to enables) him to clear Infosys interview process. Do you find it smooth? I do not.

The same could have been achieved in a better and effective way. People know that Civil Engineering isn't paying. And if paying, it's not the craze. It is not the one where mob push lies. And moreover, we have tracked path to USA with the guy's brother as example. I ask why would anyone bother trying anything new? (Although it saves few years.)

It itches when you see all these potential, who could have started adding values long-back, is doing interview passer courses that enable them earn 8000 INR/month. And then they wait clock to tick away 2 years so that, they can apply a job where they ask 2+ experience.
It is too procedural. It is boring. Are we having all these branches, engineering colleges estabilished and mashrooming up to produce software engineers? You cant deny the preciding statement. And if you agree, then I ask another question. Is it correct? Isn't it a removable inefficiency. All my post says why dont we have courses that creates software professionals by keeping courses based on real market demand, instead of openning engineering degree colleges that make Biotechnologists, Mechanical engineers who later become software developers.


Now let's take on why I stress people doing diploma in engineering instead of degree. I am not sure whether you are following or not Ranbaxy is in rumour for ownership change. There have been long debates about IP, about patents, R and D and about egnineering and pharma grads. The main thing out of this story, India is a developing country with lot of cheap labour and heavy natural resources. It is economically favorable to be a producer than being inventor, at least for the present times. To be a producer you do not need engineering grads, or at least, you do not need bulk of engineers because you are importing alrerady-in-use technology from some foreign country which is well verified and approved. The technology won't break on daily basis in a manner that need engineering skills, all it need diploma guys who can manage them efficiently without getting frustrated. And, if you want to know the truth, India's current biggest automobile manufacturer RnD unit is a joke.


Let come back to "me" being India part. You are correct that we are the youth of the nation - we drive the country. I have that realization. I did had childhood dream of having my own version of R2D2, could be easily achieved by joinind Honda or probably I may go for higher education, some heavy duty RnD. I like those stuffs. But it is hard to stay sane when see lies opening up. You go mad when you see the best of our country labs are miles behind the sophistication they claim. You break to find out some of really nice labs are as useful as Pandora Box because of several reasons.

It is frustrating to see misguided talents and at the same time to find out misused resources and bubble boasts. So, who told me work in mob's way? I reply, I decided. I chose not to work in an area where we aren't frontiers. I decided to accumulate talent and streamline them. I dream to make an invention driven, innovation mativated environment. I look for the next big thing. And that is why I decided not to go for CERN but to create another CERN. Are you with me?

-Nishant

SLOG: Uneducated Literates

SLOG: Uneducated Literates
SLOG means Small bLOG

Mr. S is my roommate, a nice guy, about to complete his bachelor degree in Electrical Engineering in next one month. One day during talk I asked how his project work was going. He replied that he, like other guys, had paid INR 18,000 to some company which would create a project for him, work on it and before the presentation; they would finish the project and give the software with document and presentation to him. All he would need to do is read through the presentation during the seminar.

On asking the knowledge of this fact to the professors he replied that everyone knows and all the students do this.

I had got burned from my top to bottom listening this, but after giving a thought I found out that this phenomenon is almost omnipresent in India. The education is just a tag; it is not a meter of knowledge. And for the developing country like India, it is job what matters at the end of the day. And for a job you do not need to perspire on a useless project that is, anyways, going to be assumed to be a fake owing to the massive fake CV culture.

We don’t have massive demand of technical guys at R and D level for the reason that we are not at technological forefront as a country, so we don’t have companies doing research. All we have is companies that buy the technology and they need technical guys who can just take care of the process as an inspector. For doing so, you don’t need a project to be done. In fact, you don’t even need a technical degree; a diploma would be just as fine. So what is the purpose of going through night outs for a lousy worthless project?

I do not understand why we have so many degree colleges, especially in technical fields when all we need is diplomas. We need persons who can understand technology and work on them effectively. This requirement is completely fulfilled by a diploma holder. And a diploma gives you early job opportunity. After your high school (std 10), go for a three year diploma course. Done, you are a jobseeker at the age at the age as low as 17 years.

I do not understand why even after knowing the reality we don’t change, why education is more like a blind man showing path to another blind man or rather it behaves like a herd of sheep or perhaps, thousands of penguins at the edge of iceberg.

SLOG: To Mr. Tharoor

SLOG: To Mr. Tharoor
SLOG means Small bLOG

March 30^th, 2008, in Sunday Times in his column, Mr. Shashi Throor writes a fiction, “An IIT graduate walks near a pond, gets a speaking frog that requests and then begs to kiss it so that it can turn into a real beautiful loving princes. The IITian guy replies that he has got no time for girls but a talking frog is cool.” [Rephrased from: Why some engineers become terrorist]

For your kind information, Mr. Tharoor, engineers are frustrated variety of human being. A kind of people, who get frustrated when everything is the way as they wanted, for the reasons why everything have to be in their way; and the other way, they have got reasonable reason.

They are frustrated. If there is no work, they feel wasting life, if too much work then a slave. And in case there is good work-life balance, then they feel making no positive impact on the world by living like any other Tom, Dick or Harry.

Mr. Tharoor, frustration is the 47^th chromosome that an engineer adds up in its DNA during education. This chromosome pairs up with 48^th chromosome as terrorism in later phase of its life. Now, depending on dominating circumstances, either the engineer turns into more common spouse torturer or less common terrorist.

I am pretty much sure that you must have never been to pond for a walk. If you go, you may find some engineer catching every second frog and kissing to get a possible princess convertible frog.

-Nishant

B.U.F.Y. 11: THE END?

Baby, Uncle and the Final Year (B.U.F.Y.) 11: THE END?
Links for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4, Part5, Part6, Part7, Part8, Part9, Part10
[This is the last part of the series]

F**k you Tavant Technologies: Tavant Technologies is one of the worst things that ever happened to me – they are one big cheat. On 27^th of April they informed us that our joining date is December the 10^th, which means six months of unemployment – or in other words, they were saying that they have hired us but they aren’t capable to pay us so we should get out in the market searching another job for ourselves.

There are many aspects of this organization which I knew from my different sources inside Tavant at the time.

1. Their major (perhaps only) client which accounted for 70% of the revenue had pulled off their project from Tavant.
   
   
2. At the point of out recruitment, a wave of resignation was dominating inside Tavant. Their recruitment spree was a fail-safe, or may be a show off.
   
   
3. They didn’t have the courtesy to respond to our queries.
   
   
4. HRM never talked to our Training and Placement in-charge, in fact, they rudely behaved with Professor Sinha. Professor had got pissed off but he couldn’t ban the organization from Training and Placement. I do not understand this. Perhaps it was heavy load of getting higher placement percentage or ignorance or lack of gut, which refrain him from blacklisting Tavant. All we could get out of him is ‘wish you all the very best in your future endeavors’ which I readily translated into ‘guys, see I have thousands of other important things to do than cleaning the mess that you have made. Go get yourself something that suits you and get off my back. I, hereby, declare my surrender.’
   ‘You are lesser of the two evils, sir. Thank you for not wasting our time.’ I thought.
   
   
5. When we came down to Bangalore, we met this really friendly employee of the company who advised us that we are luckier not to join the company.
   

And for my miserable sixty days, I will never forgive Tavant Technologies.

See you Kgp: May 10, 2007, I was a winner. My presentation was one of the best and my guide was personally congratulated by the invited invigilator. After presentation my guide called and congratulated me for a really great presentation and asked me whether I would like to work more on the project and get it published in technical journal? I denied. Had you asked me, one day before this day, about my professor, I would have told you he one of those non-believers who thought students can never do anything worthwhile. But now, he kept on appraising and I melted.

Throughout Kharagpur’s life, I have been blaming this institute for the reason that except for the days of Robotics events, my life was too static there – doing nothing, there was nothing else that kept me interested there. I was one of those guys who dragged the years of their higher education second by second, or may be millisecond by millisecond. Still, leaving Kgp was a painful experience. Once it was decided that we have to leave, we were fractioning every second to get the maximum out of it. We were trying to pull the sun hard to prevent the end of each remaining day. But then one day, no one knows when it came, we were moving out. To my disbelief, it hurt.

Ask me three best things in IIT Kharagpur. I would say,

1. Central Library: The richest library, I have ever seen. I was in absolute love with this place from the first day when I saw it and the love kept on growing. Anything and everything, you can get on pages, were there. Muse yourself, explore anything you want, surprise yourself. It is one of the least utilized resources of IIT Kharagpur. Majority of Kgp think that it is good for nothing, I certainly couldn’t convince them but neither could they to me.
   
   
2. Robotics: I had this wish to own one of my R2D2 robot. Frustrated as anyone with that kind of wish could be, when he comes to Kgp to find a white elephant namely, iLab which runs IIT’s robotics society headed by a know nothing Tuglaq – Prof. CS Kumar. It is one of the examples of how bad an organization can become when its values are rotten by student politics of accruing certificate for doing nothing but praising seniors and professors; and whose sources of inspiration, the professors involved, are busy in self appraisal. It reminds me Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor, Gilderoy Lockhart from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.
   
   I was lucky enough to find two really serious guys who were damn interested in Robotics and extremely hard working. They were confident of making a robo-servant, R2D2. I feel myself really blessed to have them with me. They are G. Vijaysagar and Kiran C. I admire them.
   
   It used to be high time for us; once the problem for institute’s national level robotics competition problem is out. It is, usually, start of November when we start thinking, January is full of work and excitement. February start is anxious because we used to have only a few days to the competition. And somehow we would manage to finish our robot by the day and have something, really, to be proud of.
   
   We started from 2^nd year failed to even make a working robot this time, learnt it a very hard way of failures. We were at a point of being breaking off after this failure, but then situation stabilized when we did some projects and participated in some other robotics events. Finally, got prepared to win the 1^st prize the next year and then again next year.
   
   I used to resurrect in every November to die again in coming February from 2^nd year to 4^th year.
   Amazing days… huh, all I wanted to do is to make a team with my wing-mates but they had other priorities – I was a dreamer.
   
   I still am.
   
   
3. LAN: Hardly anyone can deny that Local Area Network (LAN) was one of the list toppers for everyone’s ‘Things I miss after IIT Kharagpur’ list. It was alive, dynamic. Like the library, anything that you can wish for a computer can hold, is there on the LAN.
   
   Aladdin must be jealous of IIT Kharagpur’s LAN. For everything, Kgp is dedicated to the service of Nation but the LAN. LAN is dedicated to service of the students, in all possible ways.
   MOTD: Bow to the mighty little green Dinosaur.

E for enjoy Electronic City: June 2007, with the clear picture that Tavant had screwed us, Uncle and I were calculating our chances of getting a job in next 30 days. Later we knew that we were wrong with our initial assumption of 30 days.

It was 06:30 PM at Electronic City, Nihar and GP were back from their office. Uncle and I were sitting on the Hall bed waiting of their question what we did that day (for job search). I was frustrated because I knew that we did nothing that could assure them that I had moved one step ahead in the quest of my job search. And they did ask. I was thirteen year old again and my father asking how I managed to fail in History. Although, in both the cases, they were thinking the best for me, but I felt like micro organism being viewed with single weak naked eyes of a giant from over the universe. And just then, my phone rang, I ran to the roof with the mobile. It was fierce wind with drizzling. Opposing wind, then, felt like saying that everything is against me.

I clicked to pick the phone, the first few letters that spilled out of the receiver, were ‘Student life is over, dude!’ It was Saumya Kant Sahoo, trying to make me realize that the time has come to put off the pink glasses. It was more a sort of irritating babble which followed this line and I, really, never cared what he said after this line. It was a sort of chanting that had started running into my mind – out of my control – ‘Student life is over, dude!’

Standing on the roof of the four storied building, sky grayed with depressed watery clouds, with cold wind to trying to throw me out of the roof, lights in neighborhood coming alive one by one, the balloon at e-Inn and I were strongly in conflict with the environment with our (balloon and me) feet steady on the ground (assuring each other) and then, suddenly, the surrounding buildings started shattering down one by one as someone had put a mass destruction plan all over Electronic City and here it goes, as end scene of the movie ‘Fight Club’, with loud heavy guitar with lyrics
‘ With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
Try this trick and spin it, yeah
Your head will collapse
But there's nothing in it
And you'll ask yourself

Where is my mind ...’

……. End of the Series …….

B.U.F.Y. 10: Ready to fly, Ready to fight

Baby, Uncle and the Final Year (B.U.F.Y.) 10: Ready to fly, Ready to fight

Links for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4, Part5, Part6, Part7, Part8 , Part9(Links to future parts will be available in comments)

Dhoti, Kurta and Bang-Bang: In fifth year, we were able to create a new synergy among the people of 5^th year Mechanical Engineering of Manufacturing Systems and Engineering (by ‘we’, I mean all fourteen students and all professors who taught us that year.) This used to be a dysfunctional, throw mud on others group. I kind of started feeling a personal attachment with the group and the year ended too soon to relish.

We decided that all of us fourteen would wear dhoti and Kurta on the last exam of our last year of the course. Arrangement were made, dhotis and Kurtas were brought from Gol Bazaar from a shop which provides clothing for drama groups. They were distributed to every person. Cameras were checked, rechecked. We were kind of fearless from the exam, so we went with minimal preparation of exam that made sure that we did not fail - the bare minimum.

In morning, between a lot of confusion and hubbub, we started moving to examination hall from our hostels – five minute after the exam had started. We reached to the examination hall at 9:10 to find out that none of us were there in the hall – AND IT HAD ALREADY BEEN 10 MINUTES SINCE THE EXAM HAD BEGUN. But as I said, we had become fearless by then. So we asked the invigilator to come in. And here comes the show stopper – the party pooper professor releasing a fatwa of either to go back change the cloths with something more sober (and I used to think that Dhoti-Kurta was an Indian dress!) or come next year again but sober.

We all hurried up to the nearest toilet. Fourteen people inside the toilet hall – all changing cloths – was a bit uncomfortable for the people who were already in there relieving themselves. They left the toilet immediately with a weird look and fake smile as if they were saying, ‘what a nuts!’ We did not deny.

Wrote the paper and we all came out around half an hour before the final bell rang, buried the question paper in a hope that ‘may god provide peace their poor souls, which always bear the burden of turning a normal person into anything but sane, on a mere flick of a professor’s hand.’

We went back to the same bathroom – all fourteen again – shooed off everyone inside, changed into Bengali Dhoti-Kurta and roamed around the campus, Clicked every single corner of campus wherever our legs took us. Had a nice lunch at Harrys, talked all big air-castle plan around our near future. Obviously, we were far beyond the ground reality when everyone of were claiming that they know the world out there.

I was just 22 days away to learn the first lesson of “ground reality” when I boasted my semi-truth claim of ‘I know because I have seen!’ (And tighten my neck as a proud crane.)

I am attaching few snaps that you may find interesting.

Uncertain goodbye: I thought it to be a joke when Uncle came to my room dry mouthed, half worried and gasping to inform me that Nitisha and he were provided with a joining date of December 10, 2007 by Tavant Technology which was the same organization I was placed in. I thought it as a trifle matter that would be solved by some talking. And I wasn’t much involved until I had got the same.

I was ignorant until I realized that IIT Kharagpur’s Training and Placement department was as feeble as we were. All they could do was to say ‘we hope the best for your future endeavors.’ The moment these words came out of Professor Sinha – the then TnP in-charge, I felt like someone punched a powerful kick into my gut, I was on periphery again. All plans were subdued. When everyone else were calling home to inform that they would come on the certain date, I was playing juggling with my plans, spreading a confusion whether I would go home or Bangalore – switching back and forth, I was one poor soul asking for mercy from someone whom I did not know for something which I did not do. I was desperately searching for panic button.

B.U.F.Y. 9: Close Encounters of the Third Kind

Baby, Uncle and the Final Year (B.U.F.Y.) 9: Close Encounters of the Third Kind

Links for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4, Part5, Part6, Part7, Part8 (Links to future parts will be available in comments)

Uncle’s Bear Bottle Bottom-up: With yet another treat by Bio-Techies for the reason of why-do-we-need-a-reason-for-after-placement-party. Uncle came, drunk, straight to my room and announced aloud that he had managed to drink a full bear bottle without getting sleep in between. For your information, Uncle used to be a great drinker in his boasts only. Uncle had this habit to doze off after having half a bottle of bear, at most. I disbelieved and continued listening Iron Maiden. Uncle left the room in frustration.

Half an hour later, late in mid night, Baby knocked the door to go and check whether Uncle was alive. Uncle was watching South Park with immense concentration and was cutting the skin near to his thumb’s root. (It always gave me creep!) We sat next to him and kept bugging until he shut the show and was ready to dance on ‘Namak Ishq Ka’ song. (I really amazed how we had come to this decision.)

Dancing, dancing… suddenly half the way of the song, I didn’t know what came to Uncle’s drunk brain, he popped his shaking bums out (as if it wasn’t a part of his body) and pulled his tracks down showing his bare posteriors. I certified that Uncle had had a full bear bottle inside his belly.

This was the third time in two semesters when Uncle did it without any regret in future. Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention the second time. It was the time when Dharmu came to Kgp for our placement treat and Uncle made a camera captured show of his pee-pee.

Uncle, Baby, Kgp’s Psycho and all about ‘Indian Flag on Mars’: Very few notice that the iron giant of Frankenstein age that stands next to Tagore Open Air Theatre (TOAT) near IIT Kharagpur institute gate is supposedly a coal refining plant. It is a group three great tin cylinders, one main cylinder of 25 – 30 feet height and 2 feet diameter is accompanied by two relatively smaller ones in height and diameter. All the three were having a conical cap at the top, like a chimney. The main cylinder had pipes connecting it to the auxiliary ones and a big iron pipe coming out of the main cylinder and going into the ground by making three weird elbow turns. The color was Communist Red with rusty red variation in hue which was giving it a perfect look of a ‘once a great technology now abandoned’ look. (Unfortunately, it was painted with water-proof shiny color in mid 2007)

With our now (after placement) more frequent visits to staff canteen and Nescafe, we happened to talk about this ferrous crap occasionally – comparing with all kind of thing that could remotely look like this (believe me you are not going to like if I tell you all the stuffs we compared it with). Uncle and I came up with this fantasy story about ‘Did Indians Land on the Mars?’ It was a conspiracy theory, which proves that Indians actually went to Mars in AD 1952 much before USA guys claimed to flag Lunar. We, actually, had a plan to create a video documentary on it but could not.

The theme follows closely with ‘Did we land on the moon?’ except the motive. This documentary proves that Indians did land on the Mars contrary to the mentioned one. The story goes something like this.

Characters:

R and D Center: IIT Kharagpur.

Chief Design Engineer: Prof M. Ramanujam. (Mechanical Engineering Department)

Astronauts:

1. The mad Bengali Communist whom you can see shouting on the road with a side cloth-bag. Legends tell that he was a research scholar at the institute when he got lunatic (or marsite). Since then he never left IIT Kgp campus somehow managing his living necessities. One can easily find him near Harrys’, barking in Bengali mixed English – some time on real big issues like American monopoly and intrusion in Iraq.
   
   
2. A weird red dog. It was one of those dogs that give you a shiver in spine – not because they are monstrous but because they look like one of those Resident Evil dogs. You feel pity and angry at the same time.

The Martian: Imagine someone whom you enjoy to torture.

Continue reading >>>

B.U.F.Y. 8: Secrets Unveiled

Baby, Uncle and the Final Year (B.U.F.Y.) 8: Secrets Unveiled

Links for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4, Part5, Part6, Part7 (Links to future parts will be available in comments)

Dharmu and My confession: Dharmu – I guess, I would never find a person who worth making friend more than Dharmu. He is a typical of My Best Friend essay that we used to write in school.

After everyone of our trio got placed, he came to Kgp to share our long awaited job treat. I drink vodka, then thought, ‘Okay! When doing sin do it completely.’ and drunk 3 vodkas, 3 cigarettes and guess, 2 beedis.

After this we went to TSC at night around 10 o’clock. With lying flat on our back, on dew drenched green grass and no light around us, January night’s moderate cold air was hovering over us from our feet passing over our tummy and getting obstructed by our noses, telling us that we were the centre of the universe for the moment. We started open heart discussion; I confessed a lot of good and bad of me, and of others. (Don’t have much to write about)

Dharmu was real emotional and for the first time I knew he was serious about someone. His talk was a mix of a responsible person’s thoughts (a less of Dharmu-like) and an emotional regular Dharmu talk. He seemed to miss his Kgp life too much and unlike now he didn’t like his job then. But then most of the time I found he was really frustrated about the fact that he didn’t have someone special… a girlfriend. (A summary of what Dharmu told on the day.)

We all felt so light hearted – no one was complaining there but it was something what AOL folks would say a ‘opening your heart’, we had one of the most emotional discussions of our Kgp life (I rate it one of my top 5 emotional discussions at Kgp).

Baby opened Uncle’s Biotech Biasing Discussion*, Uncle tried to give some toothless reason to back his point. Needless to say anyone was caring because it was not about what actually happened, it was about seeing yourself from someone else’s eyes – especially someone who doesn’t belongs to biotech group yet always less preferred over them. (As told by Baby on that day)

Uncle talked about Baby’s heavy dependency on his leaching friends, Baby was defenseless. He kept on talking making friends who eventually started over powering his own decision that he made for himself… talked about Mr. S. Singh, Mr. R. Agarawal, Lamboo and few others. But then moved back to his 2^nd year and repeated the story of an alumnus coming to Uncle’s room (which, then, was shared by Dharmu, Baby and Uncle) with his wife and daughters only to find himself in an embarrassed condition when he saw dirty porous inside-out under wears hanging in a row on a rope starting from door to one corner of a double room, and then the three universally unique cartoons somehow hiding their body with small knickers, who were in equally amazement of the moment and dilemma of playing goodie good with a previous student of institute or playing loafer and skimming the girls with their lesser girl-habitual eyes – supposedly they kept their speechless mouth open and eyes wide open, and remained movement-less until the visitors left the monkey show. (As told by Uncle on that day)

But again, it was nothing like blaming, accusing or getting an answer but more like opening up to the people you believe in. We had great 6 hours, probably the best 6 hours in the whole 5^th year.

* Biotech Biasing: This is a phenomenon in which Uncle shows his biasing towards his Biotech classmates. Uncle waves hand, shouts to his Biotech friends, who most of the time seemed to completely ignore this act of Uncle. Sometimes, Uncle leaves the companion who he came with and forcibly sticks to Biotech friends who, again, are not found happy to have Uncle with them. It doesn’t bother Uncle if a truck runs over the person he came with, if only he gets a glimpse of a Bio-techie in his range of view. (As described by Baby)

Bangalore dream and Supremo’s Extinction Plan: Here is the list:

1. Settle with GP and Nihar in a decent 2 BHK in a better place than Hebbagodi in Bangalore.
   
   
2. Get a decent broadband connection and old heavy tring-tring black dialing phone.
   
   
3. Recreate wing-like life.
   
   
4. Weekly mall view, movies and decent weekends and general hang outs.
   
   
5. To become a pain in Supremo’s ass: Who is Supremo? Supremo is some AB C college grad, who had got selected in Tavant Technology and was over –happy. He is the idiot behind the idea of starting a new James Bond copy-cat community for people who were selected to Tavant from 2007 batch namely, Tavant007. Supremo was the guy who gave this idea to place order for hand-bands exclusively for 2007 Tavantites which says – TAVANT 007. Stupidity has no start and no end, he also had this plan to show this band to their seniors and make them jealous.
   
   We realized that Supremo must be screwed; we decided to support his stupidity and amplify it with more stupid add-ons. So if he says to order a hand band, we would advice to order T-shirts saying – ‘TAVANT 007 – seniors were too idiot that Tavant had to hire fresh batch of lesser idiots’. And we knew he would like this idea with clapping hands and jumping feet.
   
   
6. Uh … oh, I was forgetting this plan to buy a Gramophone.
   Uncle Help me with other plans of ours I am kind of missing all the things that we had listed to do.

Baby and Suku-Suku: Baby has started taking long times on phone, long chats on phone with occasional suspicious smiles (blushing). We researched and found out, a particular girl keep on filling Baby’s Orkut scrapbook without caring the response from Baby side. Many times it is one liner like, ‘Kaise hain aap?’ (How are you) or ‘Aap to jawaab hi nahi dete.’ (Never answer you) and I am forgetting the typical word she used to call Baby with, I guess it was Natkhat (naughty) or Sharmeele (Shy honey-pot) or perhaps ziddi (arrogant).

(Uncle, Help maadi**… what was the exact nick name of Baby that Suku-Suku used to call with?)

**Kannada verb: used for action

Uncle (tirelessly) tried everything to get her name out and Baby never uttered a single clue even in drunken state. One thing was sure that Baby liked talking with her because he never ignored her scrapbook entries and was in contact with her even after his number has got changed lately.

Baby kept this too secret to get us some material to make a story. We started referring her Suku-Suku – a word invented by Uncle for our reference. Suku – Suku and Baby’s story is still alive I guess, and it is going good. All I hope that in near future we would be able to know her name and if got lucky he would show us her picture and we would be extremely lucky if Baby let us meet her but it is unexpected looking on Baby’s behavior towards her!

B.U.F.Y. 7: Déjà-vu, Premonition and Eventuality

Baby, Uncle and the Fifth Year (B.U.F.Y.) 7: Déjà-vu, Premonition and Eventuality
Links for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4, Part5, Part6 (Links to future parts will be available in comments)

Placement and déjà-vu: I was over confident, something inside me kept on telling me that I was going to make it big. I found myself in contrast with reality. But then many other who thought they would fail miserably, found themselves in contrast too. It was our campus placement time when conflict with negative reality could an unaffordable deal… and it was.

Surprisingly, Uncle was too calm by appearance until Jan 21^st when he got selected in Tavant Technologies and then he expressed it in all possible ways of expression a monkey and a human can give together. There was a moment, somewhere twenty days earlier to this day, when I made uncle so frustrated that he went for Flextronics placement process where he was the only non-Matka (Matka: M.Tech. parallel entry. we assume, they have lower intellect.) Uncle thought he under estimated himself. It was a fun to listen this story every time he recites it with expression.

Baby was utterly frustrated as me, we used to sit and compare others with us for hours. Sometimes it gave a feeling of comfort to find better guys lacking success and all other times it was a pain. Baby kept on blaming himself for not taking IBM’s sure shot success interview and Tata Motors, Jamshedpur campus placement process.

Tata Motors, Pune gave him a chance to dance.

For me it was all down, as I said earlier, I was over confident. So every day, in evening, after failing some two to three written exams (leave interview alone)we used to go to Harry’s, order Medu Vada and Tea, discuss and vent out our frustration, veil, moan, howl and do it again the next day. It was more like repeating the same day again and again. Uncle named this phenomenon – déjà-vu.

There were two important turning points

1. Uncle had got another chance to get interviewed by BPCL for some biotech scientist post. it was a decent job and in some concerns better than Tavant's. Uncle had good chances to clear it because two other selected candidates were from chemistry background while Uncle had a biotech degree.
   
   Uncle missed it; call him ignorant, lazy-bone, unfortunate or over joyed… your wish. Baby and I call him back-stabbed biotechie. The story is this, Uncle, after placement, reduced his frequency to visit placement notice board to very close to zero, and so did we. Someday between Tavant’s placement day and Tavant’s disaster day, a notice came that Uncle and two other blokes had got selected for the final round of interview with BPCL. This information was there with one of the Uncle’s very close ‘biotech’ friend who revealed this, days after the interview day was gone. Uncle could have two jobs in hand and we started teasing him that he was stabbed in the back for the second time by one of “the biotechie.” Uncle had rather simple answer to defend it that he wasn’t interested into that job. We stopped teasing soon.
   
   Then the day came when Tavant ditched (third dagger in Uncle’s back) and Uncle push himself very hard to accept the fact that only if he wasn’t chiseled, he could have suffering a lot less pain in his you-know-where. (He used to accept this with three trouble lines on his forehead screaming that he could kill this guy if he was found at the moment.)
   
   
   
2. The second was Baby’s similar chaos with Force Motors, Pune. This organization was paying lot more than Tata Pune and the interview panel was visibly impressed by Baby’s skills. He had got shortlisted for the final round of the selection process and in next two weeks they would process his information and send him a return air ticket to Pune and would also bear all the expenses. Great.
   
   After this Baby had got placed in Tata Motors within a week, yet he had all the right to go for the Force Motors interview – which he really wanted to do at that time. Someone – don’t know who, but Baby would say disgustfully that one of those idiot selfish selected Matkas’ it was – reported to the training and placement cell that Baby was trying to hog on two jobs. And our overly fair training and placement department mercilessly cut his name out.
   
   I guess Baby would get red hot with anger if I would tell him that Force Motors is going to own a F1 team for 2008 F1 championship!

Jan 1^st, James Bond, Nagina and Non-sense: Had many reasons to cry out loud but Casino Royle was the main. None of us was placed, didn’t go home, IBM was gone and many other.

It was January 1^st. They say last year was unlucky New Year will bring happiness with it. I say it is only matter of time when you’ll repeat this.

We planned to watch Nagina with Coffee and Kurkure treat. Change of plan, we had to watch Casino Royle. Did a lot of non-sense and danced a bit. At the end of the movie it was clear nothing was going to change in this New Year, it will suck too. And so did it.

Tavant Drama: It was mere a reason to go home that I have got placed in Tavant Technology, otherwise days were going so hard that nothing seemed to favor me. For placements, they did all the drama of test then test again, then GD then interview. Uncle and I have got selected.

Happy but not satisfied at the time, eventually I adjusted myself (too lazy to try anything else) and Tavant seemed fine for a career starting. We were two months away from Tavant’s real fraud. We found out Tavant was an over-priced deal – the placement was just a backup for them in case of large resignation from their already revenue and customer losing company.

As the time window of this story slides two more months from now, you’ll know more about Tavant’s fraud – in coming parts of B.U.F.Y.

B.U.F.Y. 6: Betrayal near Cheddis'

Baby, Uncle and the Fifth Year (B.U.F.Y) Part:6 - Betrayal near Chheddis'
Links for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4, Part5 (Links to future parts will be available in comments)

Uncle and Mr. Trouble Maker (TM)*: Had I not been with Uncle, I would have described TM as utterly boring, big head muggu and must have told you that he never satisfied with whatever marks he got in examination and used to go to professor and ask to increase his marks by one.

Now, I describe him like this. Had it not been TM, the hottie from Chandigarh would have been Uncle’s girlfriend. (And we could have got more chances to make a feast for eyes)

In short, Uncle persuaded this real babe girl to join Kgp and TM was the one who was taking all the fun from Uncle’s hard work. Unfortunately, TM and the girl were bold enough to make public display of affection (including clinching each-other’s butt) and every time Uncle saw this PDA he felt like TM was nailing long, thick, rusted and blunt nail into his heart and then shaking it to widen the hole!

Once uncle was eating corn (Bhutta) TM came sneaking from the back and snatched it (and obviously started eating.) Uncle turned back to find out TM and then the hottie by the side of him. TM was smiling on his clever trick of snatching the food from Uncle. And Uncle was busy in calculating the amount of damage that TM had done to his ‘to be life’. TM had already taken the girl from him and now he was on his food too. All that Uncle could say at the moment was, “Kya kya chhinega mere se yaar tu?” (What else do you have in list to rob from me? Hmm, buddy?)

Poor Uncle, I feel sorry for you (and for us all)

*Mr. Trouble Maker: Mr. TM’s name is replaced due to strong opposition but believe me, Mr. TM does exist.

Gandi Maggie, Naale ka kinara, Chhedi’s and the Cow before the Train (Filthy Maggie, Drainage Odour, Chhedi’s and the Cow before the Train): A typical description of the most famous night hang-out place of our times, for IITians at Kharagpur – Chhedis aka 6ds.

[I am sorry that I do not have an image of chhedis', I would appreciate if someone provides me with one]

SCENE: 1

3 AM at Chhedi’s, order Maggy and Tea. The boys, who worked there, were ambidextrous cleaner, waiter, cashier and cook… all in one, they lived shabby. Here is a list of activities of a boy that you can watch once you have placed your order. He goes to pee in bushes with slipper on; the way to bushes is dusty which makes his feet dust-full. Then while coming back through the dusty path he realizes that he saw a small dirty (perhaps spotted with red spit of Pan) piece of paper submerged into the dirt – the paper usually has a semi naked photograph, nothing else can be more exciting than a semi-nude woman pretty dirty and totally covered with dirt. Can anything be? – so he picks it up, sees it, momentary pause, then he runs to Chhedi’s to share it with other worker boys. They laugh. Then the boss comes and kicks their butt, and asks them to serve food to the customers. The guy with dirty, dusty and unhygienic hands, takes the steel plate full of Maggy in one hand with his four finger dipped inside hot Maggy and on other he carries four glasses full of tea, again four fingers dipped in four glasses (one finger to each customer’s glass, fair distribution) and he starts moving towards customers – mind that he hadn’t washed his hand yet – but then, on the way, he finds out that his slipper’s strip is loose. He puts the Maggy on one of the several benches lying by the side of road, where a stray dog smells the Maggy and finds nothing interesting to fight for. This guy tightens the slipper strip with Maggy dipped hand and holds Maggy again in same manner and serves us. While going back to serve other customer, He takes all the finished plates already cleaned by a lurking dog’s tongue.

SCENE: 2

There flows a very-very smelly sewage very close to place where you sit and eat your Gandi Maggy.

Chedi’s itself is a uniquely attractive place; they misplace the orders, make a delay and that gives you a reason to talk more and blame Chedi’s service for it. If you ask for more sauce you may not get it at all, but you would surely listen a reply from Michael (aka Mohan) that ‘Abhi saadi nahi hui hai humaari, saas kahaan se laayein’ (I’m yet a single where would I get a saas (mother-in-law) for you.)

SCENE: 3

And one more attractive ambience is ultra slow moving goods train. So whenever a cow or a goat or anything alive comes into the way of the train the driver stops the train; comes down and gently make it go out of the rail. He patiently does it again, if the animal walk in again.

We love chhedi’s for the reasons that no matter whether it is your worst day or the best, it gives you unknown pleasure to hang out in Chedi’s with friends or without them (I went there many times alone in the 5^th year.)

B.U.F.Y. 5 : My Girl vs Your Girl

Uncle and Girls vs. Baby and Girls:
Link for Part1, Part2, Part3, Part4 (Links to future parts will be available in comments)

[Please donot ask for real identities]

We were guys without guts; I mean I am sure for me at least. So there are three kinds of cowards. One is Uncle Type, who can talk to girls but nothing more or less than academics. Second is Baby Type, who can talk to girl and help them but it is more like brotherly talk and brotherly help. Third is My Type, the females whom he can talk are found in two categories, one Motherly category which contains his Mom only and other, Sister category which contains his sibling sisters.

Baby and Uncle had this habit of throwing mud on each-other while talking about the others girl-repelling power. I will just put it point-wise. Usually this discussion goes very long.

Uncle and Girls:

1. Got one hot Librarian who lived in Lucknow where Uncle was living at that time. Uncle used to go in the same train as her. Happen to talk her – may be two times. Never had guts to invite her for a coffee.
   A lot of push from Baby and my side made him to invite her to his room on our Hall’s Day. (We don’t know the truth whether he actually invited her.)Uncle for the first time in his CGE life cleaned the room and hid all the unsocial stuffs.
   She never came.
2. Got another chance on a hottie (Uncle, you son of a bi*ch!) from Chandigarh. Uncle single handedly persuaded her father to make sure the girl takes admission in Biotech Dept IIT Kharagpur.
   Uncle succeeded and perhaps the girl showed some tinny-tiny interested in Uncle. But Uncle remained “friendly.”
   This story will be discussed again during this sequence.

Baby and Girls:

1. Baby is too brotherly to girls. Unlike screw minded people like me, Baby has different POV. Not much to talk, he found out a sister who were kind enough to send him gifts and home-made sweets.
   Good for him, yet Uncle never left a chance to tease Baby that he missed a chance. (I call it Atom Bomb, whenever Baby dominates in ‘Uncle could not get a girl friend’ discussion. Uncle drops it and the discussion stops with sour taste at the end.)
2. When Baby came back from his summer trip to Saharanpur in 2006, he came with blush. Something fishy was apparent. Especially when he started denying that he had a girlfriend and started talking long hours on phone.
   The activity was traceable on Orkut. But again, it was like drinking water from black well with a straw (capillary).

We were the great losers in this arena. Lately Uncle started ‘Orkut Hunt’ but it was futile.

------

Thanks to esta.sketch for the illustration.

B.U.F.Y . 2: Baby, Uncle and Bike

B.U.F.Y: Baby Uncle and the Fifth Year Part 2

Link to Part1

Uncle’s Promise

Summer end, end of June. It was quite hot out. T came to Baby’s room to take them (Uncle and Baby) with him for lunch. Out of the blue, discussion about Bengali vs. non-Bengali started. (We start it almost every time when we find someone who can easily be irritated by the sensitivity of the topic. Bad we!) Discussion quickly took a form of serious altercation and soon it became more like a one on one challenge game.

T started shouting out his frustration, ‘Loda dikha! Loda Dikha!’ [Show your tool.]

Uncle, who was fully charged by the time, challenged back, ‘only if you’ll show your buns!’

‘OK!’

Uncle pulled his lower down even before T could finish his words.
Now, it was T’s turn, who was sensible enough to shout back and left the room.

Baby, who was only a viewer till now, suddenly came to life and realized something highly immoral, unethical, devilish and nasty event had just taken place in his room and that too in presence of gods (He was a theist). He started chanting ‘Are baap re!’ [Oh my God!]

He pushed Uncle out of the room, cleaned the room (Although they did not make anything dirty, it was Baby’s own feeling of insanitation). He put some scented stick, sprinkled holy water (Ganga Jal), asked for pardon from the gods and took a bath.

This incident gave Uncle a way to maul T whenever and wherever he used to see him. He enjoyed this for a long time.
(Based on description given by Uncle, Baby and T)

Baby, Bike and Uncle’s Fear

Actually the headline should be Baby and Bike, Uncle and Bike and Baby and Uncle. Anyway, here the story.

Baby (who did not have a girlfriend) got a bike so that whenever we miss Chhedi's, we can reach there in no time and effort (We did not go to the classes, anyway). But the big, twisted Q was: Baby did not know how to ride a bike. WTF!? Who was going to take this life threatening job to teach him? Uncle took the lead and within a couple of days, Baby was able to ride his bike with hiccups and few weeks later, smoothly.

Now, Baby started picking Uncle on his riding skills. He used to mimic Uncle. He used to make a posture as if he was riding bike and then shakes his hands (which were supposed to gripping bike’s handle) vigorously with his eyes wide open and concentrating as if riding at 120 miles/hour while (he shouts) actual speed was 20 kmph.

And the second point (I support it) that Baby used to make was that whenever a road turn comes, Uncle becomes queasy. Even if the bike inclines just 3 degrees from the vertical, Uncle grips the driver as tight as if he is going to plunge the flesh out of the rider’s body. He tries to push the driver in a way to make him vertical again.

Uncle had nothing to argue, he would just say, ‘I taught you bike riding!’

Baby, Uncle and the Final Year (BUFY): 1 Introduction

Baby, Uncle and the Final Year: Part 1 (BUFY 1: Introduction)
This story is divided into parts. This is part 1.

June started with Nema leaving the institute, and thus ending the list of closest friends that I have ever had in the campus. It was bizarre to realize that most of the closest friends of mine were in four year courses. I calculated how much aloof am I going to feel in next 10 months. Pretty Aloof – I thought.

I had these three aliens in my wing; each had its own way to alienate itself. Moving left to right in the order their dorms appear, first is Uncle. This guy remembers our first meeting like this (He acts it too.)

[Scene: 1st Year, Someday Dinner time, JCB Mess some discussion about fairness of SN Hall girls is going on. Surroundings are like Chappal Gang is beating one of its own members and relishing on their own foolish uniqueness]

Someone: (being skeptical) How come these SN girls are so ‘white’?

I: That is because they eat a lot of Safedi (Whitener / White substance).

That is all what he can remember of me!

Then the other guy: Lamboo. Lamboo was the least preferred acquaintance that I would ever like to have. Causes are many but one of best is perhaps his unique art to take you into trust and betray you. I really admire this skill. But this kind of skill you really like in yourself, not in your friends. On top of that, he was a kleptomaniac. I did not want to loose my music system.

And finally, this really friendly guy: Baby. Baby was way too friendly that he almost always becomes dependent on his friends. And they obviously exploit this nature to the extent they can.

It was unappealing to befriend the three. So I started my initiative of making friends elsewhere. I started making my places in already developed friend circles (these circles are like cult. Secluded with each other. A circle member talk within their circle. But I was an intruder anyway, so I select when to go to which circle). I was much involved with RP-CTW, Vixy’s Maggu group, Shubhang Band Party and Maths and compu junta.

But unlike any other, I enjoyed the new relationships with Uncle and Baby. I really miss each single moment with them – with all the stupidity and ups and downs. Here I would like to share a few of them.

These stories may contain sprinkle of foul language, but believe me, the description is dead without all those adjectives. I apologize in advance, if I happen to make anyone feel bad. It is not one of my intentions. All the characters are real.

This story would run in parts here are the bullets I have decided to write on.

Baby, Uncle and Bike
  Uncle’s Promise
  Baby, Bike and Uncle’s Fear

Blue Pill - Red Pill
  Bike and Lamboo’s curse
  Baby’s Gate Score
  Uncle’s Dilemma: GATE crossed but no scholarship

Brain Thief -- Phone Thief
  Baby and Guide’s Chaos
  Uncle, Lamboo and Flip-Flop phone

My Girl vs Your Girl
  Uncle and Girls vs Baby and Girls

Betrayal near Chhedi's
  Uncle and Tanul Mehta
  Gandi Maggi, Naale ka Kinara, Chhediz and the Cow before the Train

Deja-vu, Premonition and Eventuality
  Placement session and déjà-vu
  Jan 1st, James Bond, Nagina and Non-sense
  Tavant Drama

Secrets Unveiled
  Dharmu and My confession
  Bangalore dream and Supremo’s Extinction Plan
  Baby and Suku-Suku

Close Encounters of The Third Kind
  Uncle’s Bear Bottle Bottom-up
  Uncle, Baby, Kgp’s Psycho and all about ‘Indian Flag on Mars’

Ready to Fly, Ready to Fight
  Dhoti, Kurta and Bang-Bang
  Uncertain goodbye

The End?!
  Fuck you Tavant Technologies
  See you Kgp
  E for enjoy Electronic City

Another Addictive Game

Monkey games -- always addictive, be it monkey lander, monkey money or slap the monkey. This time I was invited to an open challenge by Nishant Gupta (See his monkey score) I some how managed to overcome it (My monkey score).

As wrongly mentioned in the website - "It's all about the laws of physics. Think speed and angle for monster kicks." but it is "more about coefficient of restitution between different ground, time of contact (which depends on angle of attack), a lot of time killing and absence of sense of responsibility, especially when you are supposed to work."

I warn you not to try this game but for all those who "vroom" their motorcycle on red light and jump start it just 0.37 seconds before green light shows. Here is the game. Create your own challenge.

>> To challenge me CLICK HERE

Here is the game for normal people:

OMG, you are in “CHENNAI”?!

OMG, you are in “CHENNAI”?!

Damn it feels good to blog from your own PC!

Chennai – everyone pity on me for being here. Reasons for this pity are different for different people – for some, it is the sultry climate or non availability drinking water direct from tap or people being too critical about non-Tamils or some other extrinsic influence; for others, it is lack of ‘Greenery’ or too distant from friends and family.

For some reasons I find myself ok with everything, the only thing that sucks is being away from friends and high call rates. I also realize (it is probably too early to say) that people are friendly and helping here unlike the common misconception in north India. People are ok with English and if they know you are a Hindi speaker, believe me, they do not run behind you with beating rod rather they try to speak whatever Hindi they know (It is a street experience).

About climate, yeah sometime it’s a pain and all other time it is simply hot and humid. It is like end of June in UP when you wait for rain to lessen the heat but when it rains (hot & humid) you think it was better earlier.

First half month in Chennai, I repeatedly listen this warning for more than twenty times from different people. This warning is “Hey, never drink tap water. It is contaminated.” Well, somehow packaged water is readily available.

How do you find it?

One liner would be – An old metro with all the culture still alive blended with modernity, a place where gold is still a passion and you can find food shops and jewelry shops at every next step. Clean city (In Indian context given the fact it is heavily populated.)

© Nishant Neeraj

It is entirely author’s personal opinion and based on his real experience.

Pink Floyd : My Favorites

I love Pink Floyd, the way they make songs are like a live conversation between lyrics and your brain / soul. Here is a list of my favorites of Pink Floyd, but this is only a small minority of my Floyd-favorites. Listen it live.

Bothering about lyrics? Don't worry just click on the links given below the player, they will take you to the lyrics of the song listed on the page without interrupting your listening. (And you can come back to player by clicking nearest ^TOP link)

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Brain Damage
Time
Comfortably Numb
Eclipse
Us and Them
Coming Back to Life
Speak to Me
Pigs on the Wing (Part One)
Pigs on the Wing (Part Two)
Another Brick in the Wall
Money
Hey You

Brain Damage (Waters) 3:50

The lunatic is on the grass.
The lunatic is on the grass.
Remembering games and daisy chains and laughs.
Got to keep the loonies on the path.

The lunatic is in the hall.
The lunatics are in my hall.
The paper holds their folded faces to the floor
And every day the paper boy brings more.

And if the dam breaks open many years too soon
And if there is no room upon the hill
And if your head explodes with dark forebodings too
I'll see you on the dark side of the moon.

The lunatic is in my head.
The lunatic is in my head
You raise the blade, you make the change
You re-arrange me 'til I'm sane.
You lock the door
And throw away the key
There's someone in my head but it's not me.

And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear
You shout and no one seems to hear.
And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes
I'll see you on the dark side of the moon.

"I can't think of anything to say except...
I think it's marvelous! HaHaHa!"

^TOP

Time
(Mason, Waters, Wright, Gilmour) 7:06

Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way.
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way.

Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain.
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today.
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you.
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.

So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again.
The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.

Every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time.
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over,
Thought I'd something more to say.

^TOP

Comfortably Numb (Gilmour, Waters) 6:49

Hello?
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone at home?
Come on, now,
I hear you're feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain
Get you on your feet again.
Relax.
I'll need some information first.
Just the basic facts.
Can you show me where it hurts?

There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
When I was a child I had a fever
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I've got that feeling once again
I can't explain you would not understand
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.

O.K.
Just a little pinprick.
There'll be no more aaaaaaaaah!
But you may feel a little sick.
Can you stand up?
I do believe it's working, good.
That'll keep you going through the show
Come on it's time to go.

There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown,
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.

^TOP

Eclipse (Waters) 2:04

All that you touch
All that you see
All that you taste
All you feel.
All that you love
All that you hate
All you distrust
All you save.
All that you give
All that you deal
All that you buy,
beg, borrow or steal.
All you create
All you destroy
All that you do
All that you say.
All that you eat
And everyone you meet
All that you slight
And everyone you fight.
All that is now
All that is gone
All that's to come
and everything under the sun is in tune
but the sun is eclipsed by the moon.

"There is no dark side of the moon really. Matter of fact it's all dark."

^TOP

Us and Them (Waters, Wright) 7:40

Us, and them
And after all we're only ordinary men.
Me, and you.
God only knows it's noz what we would choose to do.
Forward he cried from the rear
and the front rank died.
And the general sat and the lines on the map
moved from side to side.
Black and blue
And who knows which is which and who is who.
Up and down.
But in the end it's only round and round.
Haven't you heard it's a battle of words
The poster bearer cried.
Listen son, said the man with the gun
There's room for you inside.

"I mean, they're not gunna kill ya, so if you give 'em a quick short,
sharp, shock, they won't do it again. Dig it? I mean he get off
lightly, 'cos I would've given him a thrashing - I only hit him once!
It was only a difference of opinion, but really...I mean good manners
don't cost nothing do they, eh?"

Down and out
It can't be helped but there's a lot of it about.
With, without.
And who'll deny it's what the fighting's all about?
Out of the way, it's a busy day
I've got things on my mind.
For the want of the price of tea and a slice
The old man died.

^TOP

Coming Back to Life

Where were you when I was burned and broken
While the days slipped by from my window watching
And where were you when I was hurt and I was helpless
Because the things you say and the things you do surround me

While you were hanging yourself on someone else's words
Dying to believe in what you heard
I was staring straight into the shining sun

Lost in thought and lost in time
While the seeds of life and the seeds of change were planted
Outside the rain fell dark and slow
While I pondered on this dangerous but irresistible pastime

I took a heavenly ride through our silence

I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life

I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the waiting had begun
And I headed straight..into the shining sun

^TOP

Speak to Me (Mason) 1:16

"I've been mad for fucking years, absolutely years, been over the edge for yonks, been working me buns off for bands..."

"I've always been mad, I know I've been mad, like the
most of us...very hard to explain why you're mad, even if you're not mad..."

(Instrumental)

Breathe
(Waters, Gilmour, Wright) 2:44

Breathe, breathe in the air.
Don't be afraid to care.
Leave but don't leave me.
Look around and choose your own ground.

Long you live and high you fly
And smiles you'll give and tears you'll cry
And all you touch and all you see
Is all your life will ever be.

Run, rabbit run.
Dig that hole, forget the sun,
And when at last the work is done
Don't sit down it's time to dig another one.

For long you live and high you fly
But only if you ride the tide
And balanced on the biggest wave
You race towards an early grave.

^TOP

Pigs on the Wing (Part One) (Waters) 1:24

If you didn't care what happened to me,
And I didn't care for you,
We would zig zag our way through the boredom and pain
Occasionally glancing up through the rain.
Wondering which of the buggars to blame
And watching for pigs on the wing.

^TOP

Pigs on the Wing (Part Two) (Waters) 1:27

You know that I care what happens to you,
And I know that you care for me.
So I don't feel alone,
Or the weight of the stone,
Now that I've found somewhere safe
To bury my bone.
And any fool knows a dog needs a home,
A shelter from pigs on the wing.

^TOP

Another Brick in the Wall Part 1 (Waters) 3:41

Daddy's flown across the ocean
Leaving just a memory
Snapshot in the family album
Daddy what else did you leave for me?
Daddy, what'd'ja leave behind for me?!?
All in all it was just a brick in the wall.
All in all it was all just bricks in the wall.

"You! Yes, you! Stand still laddy!"

Another Brick in the Wall Part 2 (Waters) 3:56

We don't need no education
We dont need no thought control
No dark sarcasm in the classroom
Teachers leave them kids alone
Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone!
All in all it's just another brick in the wall.
All in all you're just another brick in the wall.

We don't need no education
We dont need no thought control
No dark sarcasm in the classroom
Teachers leave them kids alone
Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone!
All in all it's just another brick in the wall.
All in all you're just another brick in the wall.

"Wrong, Do it again!"
"If you don't eat yer meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you
have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?"
"You! Yes, you behind the bikesheds, stand still laddy!"

Another Brick in the Wall Part 3 (Waters) 1:17

[Sound of many TV's coming on, all on different channels]
"The Bulls are already out there"
Pink: "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrgh!"
"This Roman Meal bakery thought you'd like to know."

I don't need no arms around me
And I dont need no drugs to calm me.
I have seen the writing on the wall.
Don't think I need anything at all.
No! Don't think I'll need anything at all.
All in all it was all just bricks in the wall.
All in all you were all just bricks in the wall.

^TOP

Money (Waters) 6:32

Money, get away.
Get a good job with good pay and you're okay.
Money, it's a gas.
Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash.
New car, caviar, four star daydream,
Think I'll buy me a football team.

Money, get back.
I'm all right Jack keep your hands off of my stack.
Money, it's a hit.
Don't give me that do goody good bullshit.
I'm in the high-fidelity first class traveling set
And I think I need a Lear jet.

Money, it's a crime.
Share it fairly but don't take a slice of my pie.
Money, so they say
Is the root of all evil today.
But if you ask for a raise it's no surprise that they're
giving none away.

"HuHuh! I was in the right!"
"Yes, absolutely in the right!"
"I certainly was in the right!"
"You was definitely in the right. That geezer was cruising for a
bruising!"
"Yeah!"
"Why does anyone do anything?"
"I don't know, I was really drunk at the time!"
"I was just telling him, he couldn't get into number 2. He was asking
why he wasn't coming up on freely, after I was yelling and
screaming and telling him why he wasn't coming up on freely.
It came as a heavy blow, but we sorted the matter out"

^TOP

Hey You (Waters) 4:39

Hey you, out there in the cold
Getting lonely, getting old
Can you feel me?
Hey you, standing in the aisles
With itchy feet and fading smiles
Can you feel me?
Hey you, dont help them to bury the light
Don't give in without a fight.

Hey you, out there on your own
Sitting naked by the phone
Would you touch me?
Hey you, with you ear against the wall
Waiting for someone to call out
Would you touch me?
Hey you, would you help me to carry the stone?
Open your heart, I'm coming home.

But it was only fantasy.
The wall was too high,
As you can see.
No matter how he tried,
He could not break free.
And the worms ate into his brain.

Hey you, standing in the road
always doing what you're told,
Can you help me?
Hey you, out there beyond the wall,
Breaking bottles in the hall,
Can you help me?
Hey you, don't tell me there's no hope at all
Together we stand, divided we fall.

[Click of TV being turned on]
"Well, only got an hour of daylight left. Better get started"
"Isnt it unsafe to travel at night?"
"It'll be a lot less safe to stay here. You're father's gunna pick up our trail before long"
"Can Loca ride?"
"Yeah, I can ride... Magaret, time to go! Maigret, thank you for everything"
"Goodbye Chenga"
"Goodbye miss ..."
"I'll be back"

^TOP

Breathe

Breathe by Pink Floyd.
I love it.
I love Pink Floyd.
Especially when time gets tough and I become down and out.
Sympathy is an extravaganza in modern world and the kind of soothe their songs provide to me
can loosely assumed to be the closest thing to sympathy.

Here is the lyrics.

"Breathe"

Breathe, breathe in the air

Don't be afraid to care

Leave but don't leave me

Look around and chose your own ground

For long you live and high you fly

And smiles you'll give and tears you'll cry

And all you touch and all you see

Is all your life will ever be

Run, run rabbit run

Dig that hole, forget the sun,

And when at last the work is done

Don't sit down it's time to dig another one

For long you live and high you fly

But only if you ride the tide

And balanced on the biggest wave

You race toward an early grave.


- Pink Floyd (Dark Side Of The Moon)