Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Gaylentine Day

[Gaylentine and all related articles are a work of fiction. All the characters and events portrayed in these pieces are fictitious and are for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental.]

Gaylentine:

The Concept:

14th February. Does it ring a bell? If No; Read on.
Valentine Day, It is Valentine Day for all those who have a girlfriend. And for all others it is just another day with all routine crap to do.

During the lunch today (i.e. February 14), someone coined the idea of Gaylentine Day. The concept is simple. Valentine day is not suitable for a country like India. It has its own risks; physical risk like danger of being beaten by Shivasena and/or VHP individuals, social risks like being exposed in media as ‘Laila-Majnu caught kissing behind Hanuman Mandir’ with a photograph in which police forcing them to show their face to camera, and few other obvious risks like economic risks and humiliation.

Valentine is applicable to minorities of India, as majority of Indian male do not have a female partner but most of them do have ‘pretty close’ male friends.

So for all those who cannot afford / fetch a girlfriend there should be a way to celebrate this day – A celebration of companionship. Since most of the girls get a boyfriend (at least we think so) so this would be a fiesta of boys (mainly). Keeping these things in mind The Someone gave it a name Gaylentine day i.e. valentine day for men only.

It is safe and easy to use.

The Story:

Baby and Mathur – A saga of struggle: On 13th February night, Baby came drunk to his room. Next day morning i.e. on Gaylentine day, Mathur came to Baby’s door with jasmine garland rounded on his wrist. As he opened the door, he found Baby sitting on bed and the room was filled with puke up to bed level.

Seeing the situation, Baby said, “You have to cross the puke river to be my Gaylentine.” Mathur replied, “But Baby meri jaan, I don’t know swimming.” Baby asked, “What can I do?” and shrugged.

Mathur dipped into the puke river and rose near Baby. Mathur was completely soaked with puke. When he smiled there were puke particles in his teeth. Baby smiled back with his mouth dirtied by his puke. They kissed each other and lived happily ever after.

This way they got their Gaylentine. Someone truly said, “Yeh puke ka dariya hai aur doob ke jana hai.

Famous Gaylentine Pairs:

Baby and Mathur
VD and Maharaj
Vixy and Adi
Sausi and Dumbledor
And many untold heroes

Genre: Drama
Type: Fiction
Language: English, Hindi
Category: For MATURE age group
Place and Time: IIT Kharagpur. February 14, 2007

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

is this true story :O

Anonymous said...

sahi chutiyapa hai...

Nishant Neeraj said...

To Anonymous: I've stated in the very begining that it is a fictitious story and filed it under Fiction tag.
But if you find find it believable. My pleasure. :)

To Nema: That is what we have been trained for in these five years.

Anonymous said...

yet again,......he proves to be the storyteller of the wing!!mast likha hai..

Rahul said...

main kahanse aa gaya? i totally support the idea of valentine's day.. gaylentine to har din hota hai :D....

and secondly.. Naishe ji, kripaya dumbledore spelling to thik se likhiye.. :(

Baby said...

oye ye kab hua....mujhe pata nahi

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