Of Butterflies and Lights

Of Butterflies and Lights

Of eyes and of heart.

Of clouds over grassland

- black and sad.

Of cold breeze of Eastern wind.

Of clay sculpture and

of tear running down its left cheek.

Of values and of dreams.

Of lust and of need.

Of trees and of seed.

Of survival of self-consuming anima.

I’m talking of

Butterflies and Lights.

- Naishe (April 16, 2006)

Authorship has never been my cup of tea. Yet, I dared to scribble my thoughts on paper and to my foolhardiness; I tried to put it in form of poetry. No matter how ugly or non-poetic you think it is, let me know what you think about it. (Use Shout-box in side-bar or click on ‘Post a Comment’ link at the end of this post.)

Although, any form of art is left to observer to interpret its meaning. Generally people bent the idea of artist in their own context, but – in case you are not able to do this – let me help you out.

This poem was written when I was not able to sleep the whole day after two hours sleep on previous night. I was lying on the bed and was re-reading myself in retrospect.

First stanza describes all the things that I visualized in the retrospection.
In second stanza, I tried to search parallels of each visualization described in stanza one with symbolic explanation of whole poem in the final lines.

►►Your comments, hate mails and/or frustration are always welcomed in my comment box. To submit a comment, please click on ‘POST A COMMENT’ link provided in the end of this post.

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Genre: Art, Poetry

Type: Writing, literary

Time and Place: April 16, 2006; IIT Kharagpur

Composed On: April 16, 2006 at 12:30 Noon

tangled web we weave*

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Let The LI(E)ght Guide Your Path

It always happens to you. When you speak truth, you think you should have spoken a lie and when you spit out an honest lie, you regret for not uttering a the reality. To me, it is like guessing the face when a coin is tossed. My brain thinks both – head and tail – at the same time. If my logic says Head; for sure, my instinct will suggest Tail and just after mouthing one option (say the one that is Logically correct.) I think ‘god! I should have chosen the other one (One that my instinct says.).’

Let me share a story of a lie which could have dragged me into deep trouble and to unknown consequences.

It was a fierce April afternoon. And after two warnings (Second one was a terminal notice saying ‘Do or Die.’) to submit a letter stating project name and guide’s name with his signature on it, I went to my new guide Prof. New. Prof. New had already made me swear on my honor that I would take the project as a challenge, meet him every week and WOULD GET CLARIFICATION FROM MY PREVIOUS PROJECT GUIDE saying he has no objection in working me under Prof. New[1] . When I met prof. New requesting him to kindly put his million dollar signature and save a lost soul from being kicked off from IIT in its final year, he asked me whether I have taken the permission from my previous guide? I, obviously, had not taken yet.

I always find my self in a situation of coin tossing with truth and lie when I am pulled apart from two equal and opposite forces. Here the notice was terminal but I had enough time, on other hand I could speak the truth no big deal. Both were light pressure. But I decided to take a chance.

I answered, “Yes, sir! Sure I did.” And as soon as I articulated my beautifully crafted confident white lie, I started bewailing on the cheapness of lie. I mean, in case one in a million chances, if this lie opens up I am screwed up.

Prof. New started dialing. ‘Holy mother of the God! He is ringing the previous guide up. Shit! Mr. Naishe, Now you are gone. May god provide peace to your poor soul.’ I thought.
But luck was sitting on the next chair to me (At least I felt that.). No one picked the receiver up at other end. ‘[Big sigh!]’. But what is this, the evil brain had started dialing his home number and alas! Someone picked up the phone. ‘Hello! Mr. Previous guide is there?’ [Pause] ‘Okay, Thank you for the information.’ The phone conversation ended.
“Okay, I will talk to him later he is not at home.” Prof. New said to me.
He put his signature and again ordered me to take the three promises mentioned earlier.

_______
Now I was out of his room thanking God and thinking what to do next. I decided to come to department at two in noon again and wait for the previous guide to come and provide me permission. I came to room.
There was no relief in room. The thought of Prof. New contacting previous guide before I do was haunting me and fear was multiplying itself as seconds were passing. I, finally, left the room at one thirty.
The previous guide’s room was locked. I determined to wait. So I sat down on the ground resting my back on the door. It was high temperature there and there was nothing to do, nothing to read and nothing to eat (I was on fasting.) and to think I had all the negative stuffs. I waited until 4:30 PM and left to my hostel.

Next day, I arrived at department in morning. Bad luck, He was not in his room – waited again for half an hour and left.
I came again in the afternoon – No hope.
I gave it another shot in evening. Haha he was there.
The nice guy gave me no pain and told me that he had no objection and would tell the same whenever Prof. New contacts him.

So, moral of the story is save your ass when you must because lovely lady Luck is not a bitch.


Genre: Real Story, Drama, Comedy
Type: Personal
Time and Place: April 02, 2007 to April 03, 2006, IIT Kharagpur
Composed On: April 7, 2006 at 03.07 AM
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* The title is snapped from Marmion. Canto vi. Stanza 17. by Sir Walter Scott
Oh what a tangled web we weave,
When first we practise to deceive!

[1] . In our department we can change our project guide every year after project presentation. It does not matter your guide is ready or not, if you have passed the project credits you can switch to any other professor.